The Miracle of Birth

Dear Maddie,

I'm going to tell you a secret. When they talk about "the miracle of birth," they aren't just talking about bringing a new life into the world. They are talking about the last couple of weeks of pregnancy, in which a soon-to-be-mom becomes so uncomfortable that she actually begins to look forward to labor and delivery! It's pretty amazing. Just a month ago, I watched your Auntie Nan give birth, and I thought, "Heck no. Not doing that." Now, I'm 36 weeks pregnant, and oh man, I'm ready for you. It is sort of hard to stand up these days. It feels like someone has kicked me repeatedly in the crotch. (The doctor says you're really low.) My belly is suddenly pretty massive -- your dad has referred to it as "Fat Albert," which I will probably think is funnier when I'm not mega pregnant, and I've basically been living in pajama bottoms and nursing tank tops, because everything else is uncomfortable. (I have counted the number of times I'll have to be in public before you are born. The number is six, as long as you're on time. If you're late, it might be more like eight. I will reserve my uncomfortable clothes for those six to eight times, and the pajamas/tank tops will be my uniform the rest of the time.) I'm still having low blood pressure issues, which means no driving for me until you arrive. So, you know, if you get the urge to come just a little early (but after you're full term), as long as you're all developed and pudgy, please feel free! We're ready for you!

Love,
Your Mom