This past Thursday, we found out you are a boy! Now, I am thrilled beyond words (!!!), but not at all surprised. I was pretty sure you were a boy all along. First of all, my pregnancy has just been different this time. Less vomiting than with your sister, but make no mistake - there's still vomiting. My belly is much bigger much earlier this time, and I've been very hormonal in a rather different way this time. (Your dad says the word is "mercurial.") Let me give you an example.
When I was pregnant with Maddie, I was weepy. I wept quite a bit. With you, I'm like a burly lumberjack with road rage. Swinging my ax to and fro, shouting obscenities at the other loggers/drivers, and only crying when I'm finished being filled with rage. I'm told it's all of the testosterone I have going on right now.
I don't know whether this is my imagination or what, but it seems as though people are less sensitive this time around. They are more likely to comment on what I'm eating or drinking, what my belly looks like, what I should have called you, what they're planning to call you, what type of boy you'll be, how my parenting will change, etc. Because this is my pregnancy, and not the world's, and because you are my Simon, and not the world's, I'll tell you about all of these things myself. I eat a lot of green apples, and sometimes I eat Kit Kats. (My favorites are the dark chocolate ones.) Oh - and veggie subs from Subway, all covered in vinegar and banana peppers. I ate those all the time during my first pregnancy, too. I mostly drink water, but once in awhile, Simon, I do have a small cup of coffee, or a seasonal latte. Seasonal lattes are some of my favorite things. My belly is big, but that's you in there, kicking and thumping and twisting around. Your name is Simon, and there just isn't a lot of room for a nickname there. (Maybe "Si," if we're really pressed for time or something. Your name is kind of like my name - it's pretty solid as it is. Madeline is often called Maddie, and your dad's name is Zachary, but everyone calls him Zach. I'm just Renee, and you're just my very sweet boy, Simon.) And what type of boy will you be? You'll be exactly who you're meant to be. No matter what, I'm going to love you forever, and I will love you and Maddie (and any other children your dad and I have) with all of my heart. Maybe you'll be a software engineer like your daddy, and you'll make video games. Maybe you'll be a trophy-winning football player. Maybe you'll be a ballet dancer or a glass blower or an architect or a teacher or a writer like your mom. You'll be my Simon no matter what you do or who you are.
Would you like to see what you look like at twenty weeks?
Crazy adorable, right? I have about nineteen weeks to go until I get to meet you, but I am so excited, little boy. Your dad is, too! And your big sister kisses my belly all the time, or lays her head on my belly and says "baby" with a big smile. When you're ready to come out and meet us, we will be so ready to meet you.
I love you already, and please keep up the belly thumps. They're very reassuring.